Rabbi Melinda Bracha Bernstein

It’s wonderfully heartwarming to stand in the center of the most divinely measured moments in a couple’s lifetime.

What is it like to officiate a wedding?

It’s wonderfully heartwarming to stand in the center of the most divinely measured moments in a couple’s lifetime. It is no small measure to step into a commitment for a lifetime and so the value placed on the experience is the highest of high. I cherish each couple in their uniqueness of story and value with deep respect to them for their significant choice to marry.

How to choose a good wedding officiant?

The most important thing to notice about your prospective officiant is their energy. Do they seem comfortable or nervous when you speak with them? Remember first impressions are the most revealing and honest moments. Also, check out their reviews and watch their videos and be prepared with a checklist of questions to ask. For more information, read here.

Why are wedding ceremonies important?

There’s a simple answer, to be witnessed first and foremost. Ceremonies are an important ritual of rejoicing and celebration. And of course, it warms the hearts of all who choose this momentous occasion, no matter how big or small or if it’s just the two of you or more in attendance.

A wedding is about love, partnership and personalities that bond together as one soul.

How can a couple personalize their wedding ceremony?

A wedding is about love, partnership and personalities that bond together as one soul. Bring to your wedding that which you rejoice in and with each other. Whether it’s a color scheme, location or theme that mimics your connection, it’s best to talk about this and dream big!

What are some examples of traditional wedding vows?

In a traditional jewish wedding, there are no vows taking place. It’s quite traditional for the Rabbi to mention "Ani leh-dodee veh-dodee lee," which translates to, "I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine." Often I help my couples repeat after me: “Do you take ___ to be your ___ and do you pledge that throughout your lifetime, you will continue to love, honor, cherish, accept, protect and respect___, say, for all of us and the world to hear, I do”.

Can you be married without a ring?

I have performed ceremonies without rings, so why not? Once a couple forgot their rings in the hotel and we were in Exuma so we did a ring ceremony at the reception, which was fun. Of course, the meaning of the rings brings together the unity, the responsibility and the blessing of commitment. It’s tried and true.

Do you think it is a good idea to renew your wedding vows?

Yes, it is refreshing to a marriage to renew and I would do so, no matter how big or small, every year. Renewing of vows brings a fresh review and commitment discussions that will benefit the couple.

Do people actually object to a marriage during a wedding?

Well, I believe that is something from the old way, not something I have ever experienced thus far and hope never to. Perhaps to avoid this from happening, review your invitation list and be sure that everyone on it supports you.